I haven't posted here in a while. I've been on Twitter, Facebook and Tumblr. But that isn't satisfying for me, I've realized... So. i'll be here more often. I miss the community. And the honesty.
I think I will actually start a new one. Yea. Sounds about right. New stage...
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Sunday, September 19, 2010
The Battle of Birth
"It's been along time..
Shouldnta left you.
Without a DOPE BEAT to step to."
=*]
And so Im "back on the scene.
Crispy and clean,
you can try but then why-
Cause you can't intervene."
=P
I've been around town and back. Up and down, high (hiiiiigh) and low. =[
But I've learned so much. And I'm ready to share my journey. Not that it's done! OOOooooh NO. It's just started.
So I'll start off with a poem. Foreplay.
Next post will be photos of recent artwork. Or maybe I'll stick it on the bottom of the page. You never knoooow.
_*The Battle of Birth*_
Every night I've made it home
full of quotes and plans
and lessons learned
Moments mad explosive in my mind.
My fingers ache to make the best of my time.
Make pure the milk from these breasts of mine.
Make sure my art isn't stillborn.
The images of queens are still adorned.
My eyes gazing from the light at humanity not still torn.
Invisible cloaks of the soul aren't still worn.
Because with blindness,
one can not bring forth life.
All you'd see would be darkness.
And thats just wackness...
Destruction of a big bang,
a hymn sang
and an infinite land
is silent, deadly, and close.
The air is art is weapon.
The packed earth the beat in a poets voice.
High on hope. High, so dope.
But nope I'm no poet, I just wanna let you know
that my heart stops
and my stomach drops at thoughts of possibilities.
Viewing forks in our paths
Knives in our backs
Lies spooned in our mouths
Defiant devils and angels together in the shade.
Their dreams are bestselling bedtime stories.
We are backwards with wisdom
Perpetual and involuntary
Any day now, we'll wake up on the right side of the bed
with no complaint
no pause, Just Go.
Move and pray.
Let the children play.
Let the CHILDREN play.
And let us create new days.
Because seriously?
Fuck Newsday.
Out lights are too bright black brown white to bless the pages of epic fail.
News is, days are meant to be filled with ideas realized
plans materialized before our eyes.
Triumphant young seeds
Kicking and screaming
dark skylarks
eyes wide open
The battle of birth.
Alright. It's late. Pics of art will be in my next post.
Love & Light,
Lany
Shouldnta left you.
Without a DOPE BEAT to step to."
=*]
And so Im "back on the scene.
Crispy and clean,
you can try but then why-
Cause you can't intervene."
=P
I've been around town and back. Up and down, high (hiiiiigh) and low. =[
But I've learned so much. And I'm ready to share my journey. Not that it's done! OOOooooh NO. It's just started.
So I'll start off with a poem. Foreplay.
Next post will be photos of recent artwork. Or maybe I'll stick it on the bottom of the page. You never knoooow.
_*The Battle of Birth*_
Every night I've made it home
full of quotes and plans
and lessons learned
Moments mad explosive in my mind.
My fingers ache to make the best of my time.
Make pure the milk from these breasts of mine.
Make sure my art isn't stillborn.
The images of queens are still adorned.
My eyes gazing from the light at humanity not still torn.
Invisible cloaks of the soul aren't still worn.
Because with blindness,
one can not bring forth life.
All you'd see would be darkness.
And thats just wackness...
Destruction of a big bang,
a hymn sang
and an infinite land
is silent, deadly, and close.
The air is art is weapon.
The packed earth the beat in a poets voice.
High on hope. High, so dope.
But nope I'm no poet, I just wanna let you know
that my heart stops
and my stomach drops at thoughts of possibilities.
Viewing forks in our paths
Knives in our backs
Lies spooned in our mouths
Defiant devils and angels together in the shade.
Their dreams are bestselling bedtime stories.
We are backwards with wisdom
Perpetual and involuntary
Any day now, we'll wake up on the right side of the bed
with no complaint
no pause, Just Go.
Move and pray.
Let the children play.
Let the CHILDREN play.
And let us create new days.
Because seriously?
Fuck Newsday.
Out lights are too bright black brown white to bless the pages of epic fail.
News is, days are meant to be filled with ideas realized
plans materialized before our eyes.
Triumphant young seeds
Kicking and screaming
dark skylarks
eyes wide open
The battle of birth.
Alright. It's late. Pics of art will be in my next post.
Love & Light,
Lany
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
[[Photos of My Artwork]]
How are you?
I'm doing very well... I've been listening to alot of music. As usual. Lots of new and old.
(Re) connecting with family. Working very hard at the art supply store. Planning lots of art projects and activist movements.
Forward... Forward.
Here are some pictures I managed to take with my fathers professional camera. ^__^ Yea. Pictures are not so professional. Haha.
Paintings. There are (OF COURSE) more to come. There is ALWAYS one (or two) in progress.
I create altered books. Palimsest.
Altered Book #1. (Complete.)
Altered Book #2. (Incomplete.)
I'll make some time, when time permits, to spend quality time with the big, fun camera (hopefully I get better with it...) and post some pictures of the most recently altered pages of Book #2.
In the MeanTime.
In BetweenTime.
Please enjoy this music...
Love & Light - Lany
I'm doing very well... I've been listening to alot of music. As usual. Lots of new and old.
(Re) connecting with family. Working very hard at the art supply store. Planning lots of art projects and activist movements.
Forward... Forward.
Here are some pictures I managed to take with my fathers professional camera. ^__^ Yea. Pictures are not so professional. Haha.
Paintings. There are (OF COURSE) more to come. There is ALWAYS one (or two) in progress.
I create altered books. Palimsest.
Altered Book #1. (Complete.)
Altered Book #2. (Incomplete.)
I'll make some time, when time permits, to spend quality time with the big, fun camera (hopefully I get better with it...) and post some pictures of the most recently altered pages of Book #2.
In the MeanTime.
In BetweenTime.
Please enjoy this music...
Love & Light - Lany
Thursday, July 1, 2010
The Picket Line and the The Parade
"I'm not your fantasy girl. I'm not your fantasy love.
I'm not your fantasy flesh that fits you like a tight glove.
I know I've been away so long, you've loved me only in your dreams.
Lucky for you, I do much better in real live flesh."
With that, I wanna say "hey watsup, how are you??" I hope you've been wondering how I am.
I've been aroooound. On alot of emotional roller-coasters and long ass lines with the occasional funnel cake and great ride or two. I feel upside down and connected at the same time. Like holding a hand in the midst of fainting... Intense all the fucking time. 0_o
Sometimes I feel like gravity is getting the best of me.. And sometimes I feel like I can fly. Feel me?...
I took mad pictures of my art a couple weeks ago. And I've been writing alot of poetry... I made a few more pages in my altered book.
But, what I need to do is get to my canvas... Sigh. I'll get to it. Or rather... It'll get to me. *deep breath and EXHALE, trust the spirit...*
*About me:*
I've noticed alot of aggressive things about me (sexually, politically, emotionally).
It's the good part of being single. I'm honestly getting to know myself and I say... I'm quite interesting. Haha... I do love myself though. The hardest part is accepting my flaws. I really don't like messing up. Nobody does yea yea yea I know... But this is my time to reflect:: bear with me!
And then again, I'm getting more comfortable with my femininity and coming to the conclusion that it is indeed a deep inner strength to be so sensitive and not have developed a brick wall.
I'd like to always make sure I can REACH UP AND REACH OUT as well as be REACHED.
Feel that??.... =)
I am a militant activist in bloom, y'all. Just saying. And my art will span posters and stickers and t-shirts and shit all over the city sooon. Wtf man. Gotta get this world moving. MOVE. Motivate... I'm scared of what will happen if we don't wake up.
*My Pleasure to Meet You*
You are someone who loves me
With the same intensity with which I love you.
You curl into my embrace and love the way I smell.
Like how you grab my hand.
Love that It's just... *shrug*
Because...
I am satisfied when you walk into the room.
I am satisfied when you sit next to me.
I am satisfied when you smile at me.
I am elated when we laugh together.
Inflated with good things happening and better things to come.
Like how happy I will be when the wave of birth washes over this city
and all out love is realized
and when I'm reacquainted with the powers that be.
There has always been this balance, this fight
This fight for balance between love personal and love universal..
Love eternal.
For the hand to hold and the hand that holds
the picket sign on the picket line.
But I want both at the same time.
We CAN hold both. And move forward.
Move ahead like we're meant to.
We're made to move like we're meant to.
Nothing less and much much more.
When we hit the floor fleeing fire,
We'll know the touch of grace
and hope
and strength.
We'll know how to dance in combat to the happy devil of doubt.
I believe in the havoc we wreak.
Put me to sleep with your lips
And your mind
We'll pray together with our eyes
that envision songs of better tomorrows.
I'm not your fantasy flesh that fits you like a tight glove.
I know I've been away so long, you've loved me only in your dreams.
Lucky for you, I do much better in real live flesh."
With that, I wanna say "hey watsup, how are you??" I hope you've been wondering how I am.
I've been aroooound. On alot of emotional roller-coasters and long ass lines with the occasional funnel cake and great ride or two. I feel upside down and connected at the same time. Like holding a hand in the midst of fainting... Intense all the fucking time. 0_o
Sometimes I feel like gravity is getting the best of me.. And sometimes I feel like I can fly. Feel me?...
I took mad pictures of my art a couple weeks ago. And I've been writing alot of poetry... I made a few more pages in my altered book.
But, what I need to do is get to my canvas... Sigh. I'll get to it. Or rather... It'll get to me. *deep breath and EXHALE, trust the spirit...*
*About me:*
I've noticed alot of aggressive things about me (sexually, politically, emotionally).
It's the good part of being single. I'm honestly getting to know myself and I say... I'm quite interesting. Haha... I do love myself though. The hardest part is accepting my flaws. I really don't like messing up. Nobody does yea yea yea I know... But this is my time to reflect:: bear with me!
And then again, I'm getting more comfortable with my femininity and coming to the conclusion that it is indeed a deep inner strength to be so sensitive and not have developed a brick wall.
I'd like to always make sure I can REACH UP AND REACH OUT as well as be REACHED.
Feel that??.... =)
I am a militant activist in bloom, y'all. Just saying. And my art will span posters and stickers and t-shirts and shit all over the city sooon. Wtf man. Gotta get this world moving. MOVE. Motivate... I'm scared of what will happen if we don't wake up.
*My Pleasure to Meet You*
You are someone who loves me
With the same intensity with which I love you.
You curl into my embrace and love the way I smell.
Like how you grab my hand.
Love that It's just... *shrug*
Because...
I am satisfied when you walk into the room.
I am satisfied when you sit next to me.
I am satisfied when you smile at me.
I am elated when we laugh together.
Inflated with good things happening and better things to come.
Like how happy I will be when the wave of birth washes over this city
and all out love is realized
and when I'm reacquainted with the powers that be.
There has always been this balance, this fight
This fight for balance between love personal and love universal..
Love eternal.
For the hand to hold and the hand that holds
the picket sign on the picket line.
But I want both at the same time.
We CAN hold both. And move forward.
Move ahead like we're meant to.
We're made to move like we're meant to.
Nothing less and much much more.
When we hit the floor fleeing fire,
We'll know the touch of grace
and hope
and strength.
We'll know how to dance in combat to the happy devil of doubt.
I believe in the havoc we wreak.
Put me to sleep with your lips
And your mind
We'll pray together with our eyes
that envision songs of better tomorrows.
Thursday, June 17, 2010
My Mommy Poem
Married single momma with five children and no recollection of how holy your scars are. Ye Yo you are are the universe with the world in your breast and sun in your eyes. Yes you get lonely but No search for what is without can surpass what is within.
Family Secrets and the Beginning of Forgiveness
Sometimes I kick my own ankles and
Trip on my shoelaces,
bruise and scratch my shins
tryna count the paces it will take for me to win.
Because I'm made up of things like
parks with swing sets
and when mommy let me ride my bike in the street.
Not on the side walk
with all the other kids,
Cuz it was just that cool to be in the street.
Most of the times I looked out into the street
lights on my porch
from the windows that I think were beautiful
because they look like Sankofa from the side.
But rules were to shut the blinds that night
We always forgot to open them in the morning...
Some rules were meant to be broken
like no eating in the bedrooms.
So I left a bag of chips on my sheets
Only for 10 minutes and I thought that beds gave birth to ants that day.
I found a hill 2 inches tall,
We were all were hungry I suppose.
I grabbed the bottle of bleach,
sprayed my pillow
staining Mickey with cotton white cheeks.
Not a word left my mouth about the discovery
Silence begets
silence can't save you from all harm and danger
So yes,
We heard the exclamations of fed-up-ness and domestic violence-ness,
homegrown pain.
These fists that exist in our hearts and minds
Not only hurt you
But hurt us too
Like primary encouragement
for a pot on the head
or a hot spoon
recovering & transforming
& a dripping red mouth
shut against your common law lover.
I've learned that it's against common law to choose wisely.
I still look from those beautiful bars
that look like Sankofa from the side.
Sometimes bars and chains
and tears and pain
become your source of pride.
I wish to say this to those
who gave me something to hide.
Who should have said it before
My double digit parade came
Leading the way to the death of the charade.
I need you, you need me.
We're all a part of God's body.
Stand with me, agree with me.
We're all a part of God's body.
It is her will that every need be supplied.
You are important to me, I need you to survive.
We're all a part of God's body.
Stand with me, agree with me.
We're all a part of God's body.
It is her will that every need be supplied.
You are important to me, I need you to survive.
I pray for you , you pray for me.
I love you, I need you to survive.
I won't harm you with words from my mouth.
I love you, I need you to survive.
I love you, I need you to survive.
I won't harm you with words from my mouth.
I love you, I need you to survive.
Therapy Pt. 1
Revelation: In my attempt to understand, I must digest and translate. Not regurgitate.
It was the first morning of the world.
And we came with accents.
But our secrets stolen. Our shit taken. Our skin radiated light like sun under our skins. Read, yellows and browns.
Our wombs may-be made
To heal and nurse back the black and blue bruises and wounds.
Push us out from the Earth. Pushed down. We push back up and out back, expanding to take it back.
Children strong from the start.
Back to the Future now.
Back to where we started from, when stars burned in our eyes. Brighter than the North star. Brighter than it is from afar.
The next morning, We will wake up next to a river.
Our voices and hearts stronger than ever.
(A compilation of some stuff I think in poem form.)
Friday, June 11, 2010
Precursor to Poetry...
Only in growth, reform and change, paradoxically enough, is true security to be found.
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Stay Vibrating Higher...
I've been having great big long days... They feel so unreal when I get home. They feel like eternities and are worth more than gold... Everyday I expand and Im learning to live with Purpose. Knowledge not just Faith. Because faith is married to doubt... Ya know?? I don't wanna doubt my life. I wanna live without fear. Fear holds me from being that one I know that I can become. I gotta push back against myself sometimes...
And I'm learning that success is married to failure.
Everything has happened for a reason. And everything I do must be a preparation for what will come. I know I will get what I have prayed for. I am building up momentum. I am all that there is and I operate through Love. It's all love. It's all for the love...
I met and connected with actor Mel Jackson today at Hue-Man Bookstore in Harlem. He was doin a theatre workshop which turned into a spiritual gathering focused on moving forward and fulfilling your purpose given by the Creator, God, Love, Nature... through a gift you are born with.
(Of course I gotta put my soul mama on this post. I'm gonna see both my mamas (J Monae and E Badu) on June 7th!!)
Once we know. We have to make a decision which direction we will go without fear or doubt. First steps are the hardest. And I have to take mine 2mm. Now. NOW!!! As I type this letter... I just continued a painting and I wanna continue my altered book and publish some poetry. Make my lists and get on my grind. Jump up from bed running no even stepping anymore. Dance classes are in effect this summer!
I often wonder what gift I am to focus on to bring Light and Love into this world so that I can help save it... Is it painting? Singing? Dancing? Writing? Speaking? Smiling...? But Im gonna stop wondering. I'ma just gonna follow the flow of what is natural for me. Whatever motivation comes to me. Make myself available for the light... Sit in a room alone and let it happen. Pay attention to my dreams.
Becoming more comfortable with the idea of embarrassment because of me showing my soul in front of others.... But that's how we know its real... We feel it. And it's a strong pulse that just leads me and guides me...
Systems of Manifestation of Creativity vary every day for me. You know how I'm always all over the place and I wanna do so much...
False Evidence Appearing Real gets in my way though....!! Grrr. >=(
Anyway... My tattoos and one piercing and hair dye is in effect this summer also. I feel my wings... I'm grooving with mad new music... I dance in my room and imagine choreographing and singing in concert and shit... I gotta make it happen.
Also, I broke up with my Jersey girl. By far the best relationship I've ever been a part of. Also by far the most cataclysmic... Hm.
So I'm a free agent and I'm enjoying another certain beautiful girl... She's just beautiful. We groove so well. So much alike but so very different. Let's call her Daisy the Poet. =) But of course complications arise... But it's ok because I don't need commitment to anyone but myself rite now...
I'm going to focus on my coconut tree soul for a while...
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
Hundreds of miles... - random poem...
As I stand up here and stutter
I see patience in your eyes
As I trip over m words,
I see patience in your eyes.
My hands drip with sweat and I don't know what step to take
and still I see patience in your eyes.
To her who gave me space when ti was time to,
To him who left dinner on the stove for his prodigal daughter
For them who held their broken hearts as I packed my heavy bags
With a smile.
Things are just beginning
and I'm becoming who I am meant to be want to got to be be used to and tried to be.
Being me takes patience.
So, to me who beats her head against brick walls when she fucks shit up
and doesn't listen to her gut
follows her head and not her heart.
From struggle comes beauty
from embarrassment comes revelation.
And with sharing comes something bigger than you and I.
So as I try to calm my spirit and find peace on the stage,
Thank you for the patience...
And the love.
For I so love the world that I share my one and only Sun, that whoever believes in me shall not perish but have eternal light.
I see patience in your eyes
As I trip over m words,
I see patience in your eyes.
My hands drip with sweat and I don't know what step to take
and still I see patience in your eyes.
To her who gave me space when ti was time to,
To him who left dinner on the stove for his prodigal daughter
For them who held their broken hearts as I packed my heavy bags
With a smile.
Things are just beginning
and I'm becoming who I am meant to be want to got to be be used to and tried to be.
Being me takes patience.
So, to me who beats her head against brick walls when she fucks shit up
and doesn't listen to her gut
follows her head and not her heart.
From struggle comes beauty
from embarrassment comes revelation.
And with sharing comes something bigger than you and I.
So as I try to calm my spirit and find peace on the stage,
Thank you for the patience...
And the love.
For I so love the world that I share my one and only Sun, that whoever believes in me shall not perish but have eternal light.
Tuesday, April 27, 2010
Cr@zy
What the fuck is wrong with the world??
Why is our strength always SAPPED once we start to show our true selves?? How can I be grounded when I don't even know what the earth feels like?? I've lost my mother-land!! Yes Africa. But yes also... I've lost you.
This frame of mind can't rewind time and all our planets align. Make our souls shine. Knowledge is Power and Lack of it is Death. Live strong and mighty by those words.
I have taken a reprieve from my world. To think and rediscover myself. So much has gone on in my mind. I have not made time to make love to myself.
I can hardly bring myself to pick up a paintbrush... God have MERCY on my SOUL... It is young and terrified of dying without even knowing what life is.
It's crazy. Really. Afraid of so much.
Of losing myself to you. And you. And it. And him. And her. And them.
Goodness when will I find peace of mind.
Chasing it. Trying to find mine.
More to come. But for now a blank face stares at me through the canvas. Terrifying to look at.
I create it. I scare myself? Is that inspiration? A gift or a curse?...
Loving myself takes some time when I don't know how or when I stopped doing it...
Why is our strength always SAPPED once we start to show our true selves?? How can I be grounded when I don't even know what the earth feels like?? I've lost my mother-land!! Yes Africa. But yes also... I've lost you.
This frame of mind can't rewind time and all our planets align. Make our souls shine. Knowledge is Power and Lack of it is Death. Live strong and mighty by those words.
I have taken a reprieve from my world. To think and rediscover myself. So much has gone on in my mind. I have not made time to make love to myself.
I can hardly bring myself to pick up a paintbrush... God have MERCY on my SOUL... It is young and terrified of dying without even knowing what life is.
It's crazy. Really. Afraid of so much.
Of losing myself to you. And you. And it. And him. And her. And them.
Goodness when will I find peace of mind.
Chasing it. Trying to find mine.
More to come. But for now a blank face stares at me through the canvas. Terrifying to look at.
I create it. I scare myself? Is that inspiration? A gift or a curse?...
Loving myself takes some time when I don't know how or when I stopped doing it...
Monday, March 8, 2010
Breakbeat Escapism
"You're a leader cuz you are so beautiful...La da dee la dee da... This one's for all my stars..."- GNU
My weekend was the bomb... like tick tick boom! : )
Momma's Hip Hop Kitchen!
You already know!! The vibe is always so true and lovely.
A lotta new artists. A couple ones I've seen before. I love my womyn!
Lah Tere! Rebel Diaz! Nene Ali! Misnomers! LMNOP! 3XALADYCREW! GNU!! (MY FAVE) Kalae All Day!! (My other fave) Patty Dukes! And the DJ's were amazing... DJ Chela and DJ Bonnie Danger... Mmmmm tasty...
Mad B-Girls reppin all over the world. Even Austria. :-O
I was truly blessed to see this performance. I got a GOODWOOD ring. Holla!!! You betta go get yoself some goodwood if ya know whats good for ya...
The song I can't get enough of is "Pretty People" by GNU. Check it out. Trust me... You won't be disappointed. These girls are ILL. Ooooh aaaaah...
Got some hair accessories. (Mismatched hanging earrings very Afrocentric...Love them.)
Then went and had mad fun in Queens with my twin and one of my besties. WE some radical feminists ya heard?
Ain't ntn like being out ur mind and still havin political convos. That's what real friends do. :-P
***************************************************
Anyway... I woke up this morning feelin sorta off balance.
I made it to my first class but soon realized today was no a school day for me. Even though it is beautiful today and it will be for the rest of the week, I can't seem to feel the buzz.
So, I'm home. Gonna sleep and recoup and gain some energy back. I'm drained.
After I sleep, I'm gonna paint and write and juts get back on track with myself.
Because although there are new parts of me I'm discovering, I still need the older, vital parts of me to cooperate. Everyday, I feel myself growing. My mind is expanding at full force and It's hard to keep up with so much I have to do and want to do and need to do.
I've been readin so much. Sooooo much. My mind isn't full yet. I just like to KNOW... ya know?...
My art is not like me at all. It's confined. It's controlled. It's calculated. Damn. I gotta change it all to reflect the me i know now. Visceral....
But first I need sleep.
So sleep first. Then I'll get up and paint and intro y'all to some new poetry.
Ashe.
My weekend was the bomb... like tick tick boom! : )
Momma's Hip Hop Kitchen!
You already know!! The vibe is always so true and lovely.
A lotta new artists. A couple ones I've seen before. I love my womyn!
Lah Tere! Rebel Diaz! Nene Ali! Misnomers! LMNOP! 3XALADYCREW! GNU!! (MY FAVE) Kalae All Day!! (My other fave) Patty Dukes! And the DJ's were amazing... DJ Chela and DJ Bonnie Danger... Mmmmm tasty...
Mad B-Girls reppin all over the world. Even Austria. :-O
I was truly blessed to see this performance. I got a GOODWOOD ring. Holla!!! You betta go get yoself some goodwood if ya know whats good for ya...
The song I can't get enough of is "Pretty People" by GNU. Check it out. Trust me... You won't be disappointed. These girls are ILL. Ooooh aaaaah...
Got some hair accessories. (Mismatched hanging earrings very Afrocentric...Love them.)
Then went and had mad fun in Queens with my twin and one of my besties. WE some radical feminists ya heard?
Ain't ntn like being out ur mind and still havin political convos. That's what real friends do. :-P
***************************************************
Anyway... I woke up this morning feelin sorta off balance.
I made it to my first class but soon realized today was no a school day for me. Even though it is beautiful today and it will be for the rest of the week, I can't seem to feel the buzz.
So, I'm home. Gonna sleep and recoup and gain some energy back. I'm drained.
After I sleep, I'm gonna paint and write and juts get back on track with myself.
Because although there are new parts of me I'm discovering, I still need the older, vital parts of me to cooperate. Everyday, I feel myself growing. My mind is expanding at full force and It's hard to keep up with so much I have to do and want to do and need to do.
I've been readin so much. Sooooo much. My mind isn't full yet. I just like to KNOW... ya know?...
My art is not like me at all. It's confined. It's controlled. It's calculated. Damn. I gotta change it all to reflect the me i know now. Visceral....
But first I need sleep.
So sleep first. Then I'll get up and paint and intro y'all to some new poetry.
Ashe.
Thursday, February 18, 2010
The Truth is On It's Way
"Black Liberation Educate to Liberate The Liberator Motivators Open Mic Theatre Play Classes Secretary Black Legacy Assata Black Panthers Female Lesbian Feminism I Want a Wife Audre Lorde Lucille Clifton Nikki Giovanni Music Erykah Badu Green Eyes Jazz Nina Simone..."
That was what you would hear flyin around in my brain if you opened the door to it! And cut.
A new page in my Altered Book...
I have many more planned. But you know how school work gets in the way.. :-/ Do you?...
I fixed the painting...
Title: Sagaba
I have many other paintings sketched out and waiting to come alive. I just have to make time for them... Damn man... I'm preparing for the long haul...
I have a list of stuff to buy from Dick Blick... I'm waaaay low on art supplies. Brushes and mineral spirits mostly...
I've been drowning in Nina Simone and I recently was introed to the poetry/ music of Nikki Giovanni. Her Album "The Truth is On It's Way" is a compilation of Black Gospels with her reciting poetry in the midst.
One of my favorite songs is "Peace Be Still/ Great Pax White".
Another is "Ego Trippin"
You just can't deny an anointed sistah...
I'm reading Assata (her autobio). I can't believe I've been so ignorant. I had firm idea of my history. I payed more attention to what my teachers were saying than to what my father was reading. I feel like I'm in the process of claiming parts of myself that never found a home. Black Lesbian Activist Artist Peer Educator Student Leader. That is the me I know has a lot of work to do to fully realize it. All of those parts of me have had some experience but now comes the opportunity to come full force.
So. I'm hosting and Open Mic for Black Legacy. I'm the secretary by the way... :-)
Title is: Motivators. The concept is to use your words, knowledge, spirit and presence to uplift, motivate, educate and hopefully liberate your fellow students. Lot to look forward to. ESPECIALLY my debut on the mic.
Hmmm... What to say what to say??? I'm nervous. D-: I just hope I don't freeze up. I most likely won't though. The Spirit usually comes through in the clutch...
Some new poetry...
I am from Heaven
My lips opened for God's breath and when she shuddered the first baby kicked into tummy of time.
I scare myself sometimes.
Nights when I pray
kneeling to talk to myself
I hold my breath
treading the underside of the truth
grasping for the half lies that keep me here bound to this earth.
Time beats and life forgot how to hold itself
dear you...
When was the last time you spoke to the inkwell
be it brown or
blue skies don't match the color of my tears.
Falling down in waves
trickling down the sink
as I try to catch the last bit of insanity that brought me here.
You poisoned my pen and murdered my message
So what will you do when I decide to stop?
To with hold that last second of maybes and next times.
Claiming your now and hereafter.
Over your black blue bruising hands and lips, eyes and feet.
Assumption of possession of this great black peace.
My body, my dreams and my mind.
Think before I decide.
And that's it... Leave comments if you wish. I'm off to bed now. Class at 930am...
*yaaaawn*
deuces.
That was what you would hear flyin around in my brain if you opened the door to it! And cut.
A new page in my Altered Book...
I have many more planned. But you know how school work gets in the way.. :-/ Do you?...
I fixed the painting...
Title: Sagaba
I have many other paintings sketched out and waiting to come alive. I just have to make time for them... Damn man... I'm preparing for the long haul...
I have a list of stuff to buy from Dick Blick... I'm waaaay low on art supplies. Brushes and mineral spirits mostly...
I've been drowning in Nina Simone and I recently was introed to the poetry/ music of Nikki Giovanni. Her Album "The Truth is On It's Way" is a compilation of Black Gospels with her reciting poetry in the midst.
One of my favorite songs is "Peace Be Still/ Great Pax White".
Another is "Ego Trippin"
You just can't deny an anointed sistah...
I'm reading Assata (her autobio). I can't believe I've been so ignorant. I had firm idea of my history. I payed more attention to what my teachers were saying than to what my father was reading. I feel like I'm in the process of claiming parts of myself that never found a home. Black Lesbian Activist Artist Peer Educator Student Leader. That is the me I know has a lot of work to do to fully realize it. All of those parts of me have had some experience but now comes the opportunity to come full force.
So. I'm hosting and Open Mic for Black Legacy. I'm the secretary by the way... :-)
Title is: Motivators. The concept is to use your words, knowledge, spirit and presence to uplift, motivate, educate and hopefully liberate your fellow students. Lot to look forward to. ESPECIALLY my debut on the mic.
Hmmm... What to say what to say??? I'm nervous. D-: I just hope I don't freeze up. I most likely won't though. The Spirit usually comes through in the clutch...
Some new poetry...
I am from Heaven
My lips opened for God's breath and when she shuddered the first baby kicked into tummy of time.
I scare myself sometimes.
Nights when I pray
kneeling to talk to myself
I hold my breath
treading the underside of the truth
grasping for the half lies that keep me here bound to this earth.
Time beats and life forgot how to hold itself
dear you...
When was the last time you spoke to the inkwell
be it brown or
blue skies don't match the color of my tears.
Falling down in waves
trickling down the sink
as I try to catch the last bit of insanity that brought me here.
You poisoned my pen and murdered my message
So what will you do when I decide to stop?
To with hold that last second of maybes and next times.
Claiming your now and hereafter.
Over your black blue bruising hands and lips, eyes and feet.
Assumption of possession of this great black peace.
My body, my dreams and my mind.
Think before I decide.
And that's it... Leave comments if you wish. I'm off to bed now. Class at 930am...
*yaaaawn*
deuces.
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
I'm up now. Oh. This is Love.
I partied all nite last nite. Then worked all day today. So, naturally, I was a zombie. Came home and KNOCKED OUT. DEAD TO THE WORLD.
Now I'm up after 10 hours of REFRESHING SLEEP.
Now playing- John Legend, Jennifer Hudson, Jazmine Sullivan, IndiaArie, Janelle Monae, K-OS, SADE...
And just I worked on a couple pages of Book of Revelations... It's a start. (Click for larger images...)
That's a pic of my one of my lil twin sisters when they were like one. They're two now.
And that's a pic of my mom when we still lived with my dad's mom in queens and me and my sis were like ten... idk. young. Yea.
Me and my girlfriend are having a problem. And It feels like it's... significant. Sigh. Smh. :-/
And so... Now's the time to sign off. I'm praying for another day ahead of me of course.
Goodnite.
...I'm not scared of lions and tigers and bears...
Now I'm up after 10 hours of REFRESHING SLEEP.
Now playing- John Legend, Jennifer Hudson, Jazmine Sullivan, IndiaArie, Janelle Monae, K-OS, SADE...
And just I worked on a couple pages of Book of Revelations... It's a start. (Click for larger images...)
That's a pic of my one of my lil twin sisters when they were like one. They're two now.
And that's a pic of my mom when we still lived with my dad's mom in queens and me and my sis were like ten... idk. young. Yea.
Me and my girlfriend are having a problem. And It feels like it's... significant. Sigh. Smh. :-/
And so... Now's the time to sign off. I'm praying for another day ahead of me of course.
Goodnite.
...I'm not scared of lions and tigers and bears...
Monday, January 11, 2010
Blessing the Boats
Happy Belated New Year. BIG things are gonna happen for me.
Btw that's gonna my first my first tattoo.
"BIG" In really intricate, bold lettering but on a small part of my body. ...Big dreams, big goals, big thinking, big faith, big love.
Just. Big.
I'm starting another altered book. It feels like I'm looking backwards. Looking in old mags, old love notes and listening to throwback music...
The first one I did was in high school and it inspired me so much... more than my usual sketch book for some inexplicable reason...
Well.... It was done inside of a book called The Thin Place. Look it up if you want. By Kathryn Davis. I bought it in a .99 store. Wasn't a good story at all... But it served a higher purpose. :-)
Pictures... (click them for larger view...)
And...
The new one is named "Book of Revelations".
It feels like it's going to be just that... A compilation of the past year... a re-definition and re-dedication of myself...
It's being done on the book named "Attitude is Everything" by Kieth Harrell. A pretty great book. My dad had two copies so he let me use one.
NEW PAGES WILL BE POSTED AS THEY ARE COMPLETED. A few pages are started ALREADY!! :-)
In the Name of the
Creator, Healer
Magic & Faith
Amen, Ase, Blessed Be
Thank you for the infinite blessings
I witness, experience, and receive
May my heart, body, spirit and mind
Be open to the healing power of the divine.
May that healing flow
through, between, within, amid
the connections I have with all that lives.
May I walk in a path of love & light
May hope not fear be my drive
May I let go of control & expectation
Instead be responsible & live with intention
May I have the strength & courage for the journey ahead
May I be aware of where my feet tread
May patience ease dissatisfaction & unrest
May I speak truth, May my dreams manifest
And when my soul from this body's released
May my spirit fly free
my life have brought peace
and all those that I love know that to be.
In the Name of the
Creator, the Healer
Magic & Faith
Amen, Ase, Blessed Be
-A Daily Prayer by YaliniDream
Thursday, December 10, 2009
Future::Sagaba::Oxygen
::IMPORTANT::LYRICS::(AND AWESUM BLOG LINK::)
"...she got that gift of gravity pulling to ask her name
she says sagaba
what’s it mean?
she says in ilokano
it translates into suffering..."
"...now i couldn’t stand to see the queen breathe her dreams away
and tell me her tomorrow will never become today"
"dreams be the ashes burnt and thrashing in the wind
flying out of the burning bush attached to sista’s hand
she whispers “word”
smiling giving thanks and living in
doubt, no longer as she figures out the riddle to the song
saying why must we suffer now to not suffer later if
later never comes soon enough to soothe the hatred
and hatred is the cancer spilling out love’s absence
and the absence is the void left from missing every chance to
challenge our fate and perhaps our very names
sista says peace and prayers for rain and change"
...I feel like the storyteller met me...in a way...word...
Yo. I've been feeling Blue Scholars deep in my bones for like... mad long...
☛ Sooo... I had a dream a couple of nights ago ☚
::::: I fell asleep and In the dream I was in the bed that I fell asleep in as if I was awake. But. I couldn't move!! I was so terrified!!
I tried to call my sister. She came in the room even though I couldn't even open my mouth. She couldn't help me I tried to lift me legs... my arms... my head... I couldn't do a damn thing. Like I was paralyzed.
Then a mirror appeared before me so that I could see my body. So I could see my struggle. Then I looked myself in the face and thought::: If God wants me to move, He will allow me to move:::
Then I moved my head to get in a more comfortable position to wait for God's word. To my surprise, my head moved so freely and that movement woke me up as if I had moved in my head while I was awake.
I woke up even more terrified because God has spoken to me. Then after a couple seconds with the light on in my room... I became elated.
I had been praying for a word from Him. A steady rock. An encouragement that everything will be alright in this season of intense turmoil in my life. And He came through.
That's why I stay on my grind, yo. I want my dreams...my goals...to be as big as my actions...
And so. Through all the prayer, and the church...and more prayer. And off the CHAIN pastors and ministers who sound crazy and act sorta ghetto... (God has a sense of humor ya'll)...
I'm blessed more than a muh f*cka. :-D
Jay-Z is right. Life starts when the church ends. But that's only cuz God follows wherever you take him. Don't have to keep ur praise in the building. I still raise and clap my hands anywhere I go.
Thank you Lord. :-)
Ok.. So... mad shit goin down in my family. Court cases. Yes. Plural.
Uhm...School madness. (When, oh when is my turn?? Soon!! Now!!)
Work stress. (Rude people don't deserve customer service. We need a slapping policy...gnome sayin'??)
But at this moment...
I'm dying to finish up...
.jpg)
...this painting.>>> *Up!*
Wats this?!!
:-D
(Music:: Shing02 "Luv (sic) pt. 2")
Reminds me of the painting I did of my lil sis...
.jpg)
>>*Oxygen*<< Inspired by Willy Mason "Oxygen"
"...I wanna be better than oxygen
So you can breathe when you're drowning and weak in the knees
I wanna speak louder than Ritalin
For all the children who think that they've got a disease
I wanna be cooler than t.v.
For all the kids that are wondering what they are going to be
We can be stronger than bombs
If you're singing along and you know that you really believe
We can be richer than industry
As long as we know that there's things that we don't really need
We can speak louder than ignorance
Cause we speak in silence every time our eyes meet...."
It's amazing. It's beautiful. Peace.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
ReVamp
I'm "Bright-eyed, bushy-tailed and off beat."
I'm an amateur at this ... But i'm feeling great nonetheless.
Thanxxx to my GirlJimmy for inspiring me to revisit cool calm pete. Don't have him in my i-pod. I have no reason. Yessss, I should be punished. Lol.
Jammin to Mos Def lately. This track is most definitely my mantra for this moment in my life. My mind's life. My life's mind.
This week has been pretty great because of my state of mind. I'm just ACHING to express myself...
A POSITIVE STATE OF MIND is NECESSARY for success. Even if that means just getting through the day.
Church was last nite.
The guy who plays the keyboard in our house band ministered to us.
He's so full of funk maaaaan... His approach in God and life is soooo gangsta. I mean, I was feeling everything he was saying. About prayer and fasting. And GIVING GOD ACCESS and trusting in the Lord and his mighty power. :-D
Makes me smile and just give thanks for his goodness. Because of who he is, I don't have to worry.
Yea I'm human and I get caught up in things and situations and emotions...but I know htat if I just take a minute and breath and get connected with the soul and Spitit within me... I know he got the victory.
So... with that said. I got that ole familiar itch in my fingertips.
I'm ready.
For the paint.
For the action.
Let's go.
I'm an amateur at this ... But i'm feeling great nonetheless.
Thanxxx to my GirlJimmy for inspiring me to revisit cool calm pete. Don't have him in my i-pod. I have no reason. Yessss, I should be punished. Lol.
Jammin to Mos Def lately. This track is most definitely my mantra for this moment in my life. My mind's life. My life's mind.
This week has been pretty great because of my state of mind. I'm just ACHING to express myself...
A POSITIVE STATE OF MIND is NECESSARY for success. Even if that means just getting through the day.
Church was last nite.
The guy who plays the keyboard in our house band ministered to us.
He's so full of funk maaaaan... His approach in God and life is soooo gangsta. I mean, I was feeling everything he was saying. About prayer and fasting. And GIVING GOD ACCESS and trusting in the Lord and his mighty power. :-D
Makes me smile and just give thanks for his goodness. Because of who he is, I don't have to worry.
Yea I'm human and I get caught up in things and situations and emotions...but I know htat if I just take a minute and breath and get connected with the soul and Spitit within me... I know he got the victory.
So... with that said. I got that ole familiar itch in my fingertips.
I'm ready.
For the paint.
For the action.
Let's go.
Sunday, November 29, 2009
The trouble with being myself.
I am relating to a psychopath.. apparently...
"It never adds up when you do your math..."
"Love is a desert and I need it to rain..."
"Love is butter won't you be my bread?..."
Never knew how much I fucking LOVE Macy Gray. She's like a throwback to a past life wen i was a popstar. Lol. I relate to everything she sings and top of that, her mind is all over the place. My kinda girl.
Anywayz... This baked ziti is the bomb.
I'll take this one on the chin I guess. And try harder at life. Cuz it's a real drag rite now.
I hang out sometimes but it's mostly me and me. Is she the one for me? I believe so.
Meanwhile, I do have a lot of time. Then again, I have only this moment. Simple.
:::FLASHBACK::::
I remember when I used to write stories that were medleys of band names and song titles... They were pretty cute.
Great song...A moment to myself... The lyrics are occasionally my mantra...
I bitch alot. Sometimes about nothing. Sometimes about everything. That don't mean I dont realize wat i got and wat i could lose. God is watching and sooner or later...he'll show up. And soooo...
The lyrics are kickass. No doubt. I'm in the process of cleaning up. So...
Peace...
"It never adds up when you do your math..."
"Love is a desert and I need it to rain..."
"Love is butter won't you be my bread?..."
Never knew how much I fucking LOVE Macy Gray. She's like a throwback to a past life wen i was a popstar. Lol. I relate to everything she sings and top of that, her mind is all over the place. My kinda girl.
Anywayz... This baked ziti is the bomb.
I'll take this one on the chin I guess. And try harder at life. Cuz it's a real drag rite now.
I hang out sometimes but it's mostly me and me. Is she the one for me? I believe so.
Meanwhile, I do have a lot of time. Then again, I have only this moment. Simple.
:::FLASHBACK::::
I remember when I used to write stories that were medleys of band names and song titles... They were pretty cute.
Great song...A moment to myself... The lyrics are occasionally my mantra...
I bitch alot. Sometimes about nothing. Sometimes about everything. That don't mean I dont realize wat i got and wat i could lose. God is watching and sooner or later...he'll show up. And soooo...
The lyrics are kickass. No doubt. I'm in the process of cleaning up. So...
Peace...
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